We are halfway through the Sweet Sixteen. In the last two games, Kentucky held off SEC foe Mississippi State while Texas defeated Oklahoma in the Red River Rivalry of Frat. Next, frat power Ole Miss will try to hold off Southern Methodist, which pulled an upset over Louisiana State in the previous round. Also, Texas Christian and Missouri will do battle in an interesting midwest matchup.
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The first two Sweet Sixteen matchups are history. Alabama rolled over Auburn in the Iron Bowl of Frat and Washington & Lee’s strong tradition held off Florida State. Next, two SEC contenders square off in Kentucky and Mississippi State while Texas and Oklahoma will do battle in the Red River Rivalry of Frat.
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The Sweet Sixteen has finally started in the 2010 Frat Madness Tournament and we have a couple of fratumental matchups today. First, two heated, in-state rivals, Alabama and Auburn, will compete in the Iron Bowl of Frat. Next, Washington & Lee will put up their fradition against the hard fratters of Florida State.
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You may have noticed a “donate” button along the right side of your website during the past few days. No, we are not GDI poor and looking for a handout but we are looking to increase the knowledge you receive here at the Institute of Fratology. Hence, like many fine educational institutions, we are now in the fundraising business.
The reasoning behind the donate button is that your professors would like to provide you with a new lecture series detailing the fratmosphere of various locales around the country. Each article will contain a detailed account of what your professors did, including their extreme frattabbing and shacking escapades, which will easily be the best and funniest part, the frattiness of each place, and recommendations on where to stay and what to do if you were ever to travel to the place. Our travel possibilities and reasons for travel are endless. We may visit places that hold inherently fratty events (such as Augusta, Georgia, during the Masters and Louisville, Kentucky, during the Kentucky Derby), campuses that need to be analyzed to determine how fratty they really are, popular vacation/formal destinations among fratdaddies and sorostitutes, and cities that may provide great post-grad opportunities.
As you have probably concluded, the purpose of the donation button is to raise travel expenses for these fratty fracations. Now, are your professors rich enough to finance these trips on their own? Absolutely. Are your professors likely to be more motivated to take these trips and strain over a laptop writing detailed articles about them if the trips are financed through your donations? Absolutely. You may be asking, besides reading great articles, what is in it for me? For starters, when you donate, you are able to recommend where you believe we should travel. Next, donations of certain amounts qualify you for entry into the Institute of Fratology Hall of Frat (which will be linked to the website soon). Donations of at least $25 qualify you for the New Initiate level, $50 for the Executive Member level, $75 for the Institute of Fratology Alumni level, and $125 for the Fratdaddy/Sorostitute of the Century level. Also, organizational donations are encouraged. For example, if several members of your fraternity/sorority wish to pool money together to donate enough to enter a certain level in the Hall of Frat, then that is acceptable and your chapter’s name and location will be forever enshrined in the Hall. Please donate today because your professors are ready for a much need fracation and we want to tell you all about the frattiness that will occur.
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Since round one of the Masters started today, we decided to re-post this classic Fratty 301 lesson from April 8th, 2007:
“In honor of the end of The Masters, one of the frattiest sporting events ever conceived by man, we will further examine yet another activity that has long given fratdaddies (and sometimes, sorostitutes) ample opportunity to flex their frat-muscles in a joint exercise of fratting hard and engaging in athletic competition.
When we analyze an activity to determine it’s frattiness, we look mainly at three factors (which we call, “The Country Club Test”). The Country Club Test’s three prongs are as follows: (1) the expense associated with the activity, (2) the atmosphere in which the activity is promulgated, and (3) propensity of the activity to lead to other opportunities to frat hard. Rarely does an activity pass all three prongs with an A+, but golf cruises through this test like it had the answers from the frat castle test bank.
First, golf gives you an excellent opportunity to frat tab. Even more important, the prices and membership fees at respectable courses and clubs price-out douchebaggery. If these fees don’t have you frat-tabbing enough, don’t worry: there is ample opportunity to show how hard you frat in the pro shop. Golf clothes (which in themselves are fratty), clubs, bags, and balls can, and should, run your frat tab up into the thousands.
Second, there are few frattier atmospheres than a golf course, especially if it is located at the local country club. These locales give you the opportunity to take your sorostitute to the club where she will play tennis while you get in 18 holes and then drink several bourbon and cokes in the clubhouse. Later, after steak and lobster from the club restaurant, you can look back at the day and rest easy knowing that you fratted hard literally all day.
Finally, golf is as activity that is both fratty in itself and also breeds other fratty situations. While at the club, a future young professional will have many networking opportunities with older members of the club. What better way to set up a bright post-grad fratting future than by making important connections with business executives over some frat water after a round on the course? Also, never forget…more business deals are brokered on the links than in the boardroom. Since the corner offices of so many corporations and firms are inhabited by fratdaddies, always remember that your ability to frat hard at the golf course will pay off in both your level of fratitude and your ever rising bank statement.”
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The Round Two games are over so the frat stakes are raised now that only sixteen fratty institutions remain in the quest to become the 2010 Frat Madness Champion. Some interesting matchups are on the horizon in the sweet sixteen. Here is a quick rundown of the games you will be voting on over the next several days:
1.) Alabama vs. 5.) Auburn
2.) Washington & Lee vs. 3.) Florida State
1.) Kentucky vs. 5.) Mississippi State
2.) Texas vs. 6.) Oklahoma
1.) Ole Miss vs. 5.) Southern Methodist
2.) Texas Christian vs. 3.) Missouri
1.) Georgia vs. 5.) Virginia
2.) Clemson vs. 3.) South Carolina
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It’s time to finally wrap up Round Two of the Frat Madness Tournament with some compelling matchups among many southern institutions. Just to recap the Gentleman Jack Region, Ole Miss dominated Kansas, Southern Methodist pulled the upset over Louisiana State, Missouri edged Florida, and Texas Christian held off Arkansas.
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After a long Easter weekend…and we hope yours was filled with good times and plenty of seersucker…we’re ready to get back into the FRAT MADNESS tourment. This time, we’re starting on the right side of the bracket, and I’ll have to say, every single one of these matchups is independently compelling. It’ll be interesting to see how this shakes out…
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Selecting the number one car in the fratty vehicles countdown was probably the easiest thing we ever had to do. Without a doubt, The Smart Car is the frattiest vehicle on the planet. As a matter of fact, we highly recommend that everyone stop referring to the vehicle as “The Smart Car” and begin referring to it as “The Frat Car” because this vehicle will make any GDI look like a Frat God behind the wheel.
The two best features of the Frat Car are its fuel millage and price. At a MSRP of under $20,000 and 41 MPG on the highway, any fratdaddy can save a fortune of cash to be used on fratty essentials such as muscle shirts, steroids, and hair product. Another great feature of the Frat Car is the that vehicle is smaller than most fratdaddies’ prized possession, their frisbee. With the car’s small stature and a fratdaddy’s muscular arms, you do not even have to drive the car. You can just pick it up and take it with you, saving even money money on fuel . . . sheer brilliance. Also, the vehicle has ample space…enough so to adequately store 1.5 sorostitutes. You roll up to work at American Eagle in one of these babies, and you don’t have to go to the sorostitutes…the sorostitutes come to you.
If you have a few dollars lying around and you want to maximize your fratitude, then purchase a Frat Car today! You will be thanking yourself when every Plan A wants to go for a ride.
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No upsets in the Conecuh Ridge region, as top seed Alabama fended off an early challenge from William and Mary (in our most voted-on matchup thus far), Auburn breezed by Cornell, Florida State upended Purdue, and Washington and Lee sent the Tarheels packing. At least UNC made this tournament….
Now, on to the Maker’s Mark region 2nd round matchups:
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