Ladies Night #1: Help! I’ve Been Deformalized!

Ladies Night is the new FrattingHard.com feature designed to exclusively provide answers to sorostitutes’ toughest questions.  Even the hardest fratting lady needs some help every now and then…and as the only licensed Professors of Fratology on the planet, we felt obliged to answer this call.

Dear Professors Neidermeyer and Stratton,

I am so depressed that I barely feel like putting on my pearls when I get up in the morning.  I had been talking to a fratdaddy for a few weeks, and he had officially invited me to his upcoming formal.  Then, out of nowhere, I was deformalized just 3 days before we were supposed to leave.  Does this mean I’m a failure as a sorostitute?  What am I supposed to do now?

Sincerely,
Kicked off the Bus

Dear Kicked,

First of all, deformalization has happened to some of the best sorostitutes over the years:  the most important thing to remember is that one deformalization does not make you a failure as a sorostitute.  It is helpful for you to first understand why fratdaddies deformalize dates in the first place.  As we said in our Guide to Formal, the date is probably the most important part of the fratdaddy’s formal weekend.  A poor date can literally ruin the whole formal, so it is not surprising that the wise fratdaddy puts much thought into this vital decision.  If a particular formal date has shown signs of being unable to handle her alcohol, has a reputation for getting to parties and then ignoring her date in favor of pledge sisters, or insists on her date paying for her own private room, deformalization is not only expected, but is necessary. 

Unfortunately, less advanced fratters have been known to improperly deformalize dates that deserved no such treatment.  One of the most common (and most disappointing, for us) mistakes made is when the unconfident fratdaddy is intimidated over an especially hard fratting date, and deformalizes her because he is afraid that she will outfrat him in front of his fraternity brothers in the extremely fratty environment that is formal.  Keep in mind:  all males that frat hard are fratdaddies, but not all fratdaddies frat hard.  The unfortunate truth is that there are fraternity members out there that exhibit douchebag like tendencies with alarming regularity, and there’s a chance that you, as a normal, hard fratting sorostitute, encountered one of these duds and functioned as a threat to him.

Another unfortunate truth is that the less-than-confident fratdaddy may question his shacking chances with a sorostitute with which he has not shacked previously.  If this is the case in your scenario, it is a possibility that you were spurned in favor of a sorostitute that was believed to be a more “sure” shacking option.

The bottom line, however, is that the sorostitute that is truly fratting hard should not be overly concerned about any single deformalization.  The fault could just as easily lie with the fratdaddy, and there might not be any fault at all.  If there was lingering questions on either side, there’s a good chance that the weekend might not turn out as expected for either of you.  That leaves only one question:  where should you go from here?  The best advice we can give is this:  there’s more fratdaddies and more formals out there.  Keep fratting hard, and you will no doubt garner invites to such functions in the future.  Continue to study and practice the principles which we hold dear here at FrattingHard.com, and you will have no problem securing all the formal dates you can handle in the future. 

Fratfully Submitted,
Professors Douglas C. Neidermeyer and Eric Stratton