Fratty Activities 301: Deep Sea Fishing (Lesson #4)

With summer winding to a close, many fratdaddies and sorostitutes are taking off for one last weekend trip to the beach before classes commence.  Although beach activities such as bronzing on the beach with a cooler of fratwater will no doubt be on the agenda, these last-minute trips are great opportunities to engage in another fratty activity that combines several different fratitude boosters.  Deep sea fishing can provide sky-high fratmosphere in several ways:  chartered boating, natural bronzing, fratwater consumption, and Jimmy Buffett music on the stereo are all possibilities when you take to the sea to end the lives of some unsuspecting marine life.

While campus GDI’s are rushing to the tanning salon for a fresh orange spray, the fratty deep sea fisherman will be soaking in rays the way the Good Lord intended:  on a boat in the middle of the ocean.  If you haven’t had a chance to perfect your summer bronze past your forearms and lower legs because you’ve lived on the golf course, this is a chance to make sure that you won’t look like a ghost on the first weekend trip to the lake of the school year. 

Of course, there is a way that you can deep sea fish on a budget.  Many deep sea fishing charters will allow you to pay a nominal amount to go out with some random people for a day of fishing.  This should no doubt be avoided if at all possible.  Instead, round up some of your pledge brothers (or sisters) and favored sorostitutes (or fratdaddies) and charter a private vessel for your day on the water.  This will ensure that your trip will register as a Category 5 hurricane of fratitude.  Ladies, even if you don’t want to fish, this is a prime opportunity for you to work on your tan while kicking back on the high seas with an ice cold fratwater. 

Don’t let the trip on the waters be the end of your fratty weekend.  First of all, when you get back to port, clean up at your beach house and go celebrate the day’s catch with a fruitful night of frattabbing.  Also, most better charter companies will gut and clean whatever you caught during the day.  Take advantage of this service, and when you get back to campus you will already have the main ingredient of a great fratio grill out.  If you do this, you won’t even need Corona to change the latitude of the first fratio party of the year. 

In conclusion, before heading back to campus (or for a weekend trip to celebrate missing your first class of the year) don’t hesitate to pick up a pole and reel in some fish from the deep seas.  Think of it as bringing a glimmer of fratitude to their waterlogged lives.