After reading this lesson, don’t forget to scroll down and vote in the new match-ups in the FRAT MADNESS TOURNAMENT.
Simply put, no one item embodies the fratty lifestyle as does the solid colored polo shirt. Ever versatile, the polo is first donned by the fratty when they are just fratlings, serves them daily as pledges, and is worn faithfully throughout college and into the post-grad fratting years. However, not all polo shirts are equal. This guide will hopefully inform and educate you in the art of fratting the polo…an art that anyone wishing to frat hard must learn early and practice often.
As a primer, we must define the “polo shirt”. We are referring to a short sleeved, solid colored cotton shirt with a collar and typically two buttons. They should be free of any decoration, other than a small logo on the left breast of the shirt. As we explain later, this tiny logo is often the difference between fratting hard and going home.
The wearing of the polo shirt is rather basic. Undershirts are optional, but if worn they must be of the white short sleeved variety. Nothing says, “GDI” like a long sleeved, colored t-shirt under your polo. It is very important to immediately note that sorostitutes should absolutely include the ladies’ polo in their wardrobe. Few things show the world that you are lady that’s willing to frat hard like a polo shirt with your ruffly-butt skirt. As for tuck-in rules, there are several options. The fratdaddy can wear the polo tucked, untucked, or front tucked. The only exception is on the golf course, when only a tucked polo is proper.
What is not basic, however, is selecting the right polo shirt. This site ran a poll for several months that asked the question, “What is the frattiest brand of polo shirt?” This poll included four of the most popular options in the frat community: Ralph Lauren Polo, Brooks Brothers, Vineyard Vines, and Lacoste. The professors of fratology were pleased to see that when the final results were tallied, the percentages reflected our own opinions. These brands will now be explored in more depth so that you can make an informed decision about your polo shirt purchases.
Ralph Lauren Polo
40.49% of poll respondents concurred with our belief that the old standard, Ralph Lauren Polo, is still the benchmark of polo shirts in the fratty community. There is little that can be said about Polo that you don’t already know. A staple of fratdom from the first days of pledgeship all the way though post-grad fratting, the solid colored Polo is always a safe bet. One of the upsides to the Polo brand is that they provide fratty attire for both men and ladies. Sorostitutes should note that the shirt-inspired Polo dresses, which are, in actuality, just long Polo shirts, are vital components in the true sorostitute’s wardrobe. But be you a sorostitute or a fratdaddy, there is little doubt that the Ralph Lauren Polo is still the standard by which all other polo shirts are judged. After all, we named this post, “Battle of the Polo Shirts” for a reason…Ralph Lauren defined this style which has so ingrained itself into the frat community that there is no chance that it will give up its top spot in the fratvironment for years to come.
Brooks Brothers
Coming in with 28.74% of the vote was Brooks Brothers. While implementing the basic styles and colors of the Polo shirt, Brooks Brothers falls to second place for a couple of key reasons. First, it is less prevalent among younger fratters, especially those who have not yet entered college. Many true fratdaddies were dressing fratty before they even made it to campus, and in these early wardrobes Brooks Brothers is usually only sporadically found. Even through college, the lessons of pledgeship often influence fratdaddies to favor the Horse over the Golden Fleece. However, the entire Brooks Brothers repertoire, when compared to the entirety of the Ralph Lauren Polo collection, may just contain the highest percentage of fratty attire. Secondly, the Brooks Brothers brand does not offer the same availability for fratty options for sorostitutes. For this reason, historically, sorostitutes come to favor the other options on this list above Brooks Brothers merchandise. However, the Brooks Brothers polo is still a classy device that should be represented in every fratdaddy’s closet (on at least a limited basis). When the college days are over, we recommend that these premium items take an even bigger role in your wardrobe, as they have long been staples of the post-grad fratty closet.
Vineyard Vines
With 17.41% of the vote was the new pledge on the block, Vineyard Vines…and it is a super pledge. If you are not acquainted with the Whale, we encourage you to go check out their website (warning: if you are a GDI, look at the site one picture at a time…otherwise, the frattiness of the pictures may cause your head to explode). We have tried to find something in the Vineyard Vines catalog that is not fratty. So far, we have failed on this quest. To add to the fratty look of this brand, even the names of the colors are fratabulous. “Bermuda pink,” “Greenwich green,” “Sailor red,” “Lobster,” “Margarita,” “Prepster pink,” and “Maui blue,” are just a few of the fratty colors you can choose from when you’re picking your Vineyard Vines selection. If it sounds like we are excited about this brand, it’s because we are. Since it hit our region, the professors of fratology have systematically integrated more and more Vineyard Vines selections into our own wardrobes. We encourage you all to follow suit. However, be mindful that the other, more famous brands should still have a place in your wardrobe. Although fratty to the extreme, the Whale still doesn’t have the face recognition of the Horse. Oh, and ladies, the Whale cares you, too. Shirts, sweaters, and other fratty female attire are readily available from the Vineyard Vines folks.
Lacoste
Bringing up the rear in the poll was Lacoste with 13.36% of the vote. Just because Lacoste finished last in the poll does not mean it cannot be fratty at times. However, be advised that this long standing brand is unfortunately popular with many douchebags. In fact, we have often seen douchebags trying to integrate themselves with fratdaddies at bars while using the Lacoste shirt as cover. The Gator made a comeback in the frat community in the early 2000′s, but for the reason stated above has taken a dive of late. There is no need to clear your wardrobe of Lacoste; just be advised that for every-day wear, the other three brands are more appropriate.
Although the above brands are national standards, there are some regional polo brands that are also acceptable. You, as a fratdaddy, know what these brands are in your region. They can be integrated into your wardrobe; just use your frat sense when making such purchases.
Now that you know what to wear, it is important that we mention what not to wear. We’ve said it before, and we’re saying it again: we don’t care if they are solid colored polo shirts, DO NOT WEAR AMERICAN EAGLE, ABERCROMBIE AND FITCH, OR AEROPOSTALE. That is as plain as we can state it. Just don’t do it. You didn’t join a fraternity or sorority to look like a douchebag.
Popularity: unranked [?]